Where was that appointment I made the other day?
For nine-forty-nine?
Or maybe seven a.m. next Thursday
I don't remember time

I tripped and fell the other day
On my next-door neighbor's stoop, by chance
So I sued their damn pants off
And now I have an extra pair of pants

The other day I held by breathe 'til dawn
It kept me occupied until I yawned
Maybe I can wait for a manic pixie dream girl to pick me to settle on

I fell asleep the other day on cold night
It was September twenty-first
I woke the next morning, it was March or something
Spring is the worst

I forgot my name the other day, I think it was Joe
Or maybe that's the guy from my favourite show
I'm wracking my brain and I don't even know
I think it's time for bed

The other day I held by breathe 'til dawn
It kept me occupied until I yawned
Maybe I can wait for a manic pixie dream girl to pick me to settle on

My dog took her own life the other day
A note detailed her misgivings
I nodded in my head, but agreed out loud that
Life's not worth living

I met a girl with a camera the other day
So I smashed it to bits
She said "that's so god-awfully misanthropic"
And it seems that way but it won't ever stick
Not when we're long, long dead

The other day I held by breathe 'til dawn
It kept me occupied until I yawned
Maybe I can wait for a manic pixie dream girl to pick me to settle on

There's nothing like a nice pipe-dream
To trick yourself like a good old-fashioned con